Finally a shirt for everyone!

Whether you're buying this shirt to look better by comparison, scare away potential social interactions, or you just need a face to cum on, this is your shirt. 

Gentlemen!

Wear this shirt the next time you're called in for a police lineup. 9 times out of 10, the witness will finger the shirt as the culprit instead of yourself. 

Ladies!

Ever go to the club and just want the chance to dance!? Well wear this shirt out next time and you'll have plenty of room, 500ft to be exact (moist shirts come with a restraining order). So why don't ya GET YO DICK RIGHT and buy a shirt already!

This t-shirt is everything you've dreamed of and more. It feels soft and lightweight, with the right amount of stretch. It's comfortable and flattering for both men and women.

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz (142 g/m2)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Side-seamed

Size guide